Ace Obstacles

This is my second post for the Carnival of Aces. Actually, I hardly think this even counts as a post because it is only a few lines long, but I wanted to write something about this topic before the month ended. Anyway, the theme of May is “Obstacles” and is hosted over at LGBTeen.

The biggest obstacle I have had regarding coming out as asexual or simply just identifying as asexual is definitely the lack of obstacles. When telling somebody about my orientation, they simply disregarded it telling me not to worry, that I’d one day fall in love and want to have sex with somebody, that asexuality doesn’t exist, that everyone goes through a faze like this. Nobody cared in the least to even tell me that they were happy I figured out who I am. Nobody believed me when I said I was ace. Nobody who wasn’t queer even understood what the term meant.

I guess now would be a great time to complain about the misrepresentation of asexuality in the media and somehow manage to make myself look good by saying that I do my best at teaching people about the topic, but many people have already made great posts about that.

Instead I’ll just go with the bragging. I sent a message to a youth sex section of the radio telling them about asexuality. The sex therapist that goes there every Monday to answer teen’s questions had been asking me privately about the topic a few days before, when I sent her the message, and I cleared up any misconception she had about asexuality. She then read it in front of whole Catalonia and Andorra. Hopefully that shed light on some confused younglings that might be asexual. The other day I also mentioned that a couple from the book I was being examined about in literature class was probably asexual. At least the teacher will know what the word means.

I think I’m getting good at this visibility thing.

6 thoughts on “Ace Obstacles

  1. That’s really great that you spread awareness of asexuality in your country like that. Thank you for that visibility effort with your letter and everything. 😉 I understand what you mean. All of these things can be very frustrating.

    • When I first found out about asexuality I heard people saying “We must increase visibility” and “help us!”. I really thought it was going to be difficult for me to help with this since I am very bad at talking in public, but thankfully there are other ways of doing so other than giving conferences about asexuality to have people learn about the topic.

      • I’ve been spreading a lot of awareness in my own way, too. Over 1,000 people follow me on twitter: plus over 100 different additional people (and some of the same people) follow me over on my other twitter: and everyone following me @luvtheheaven sees the TONS of tumblr reblogging I’ve been doing about asexuality (because I’ve linked my to my @luvtheheaven twitter). Everyone who follows me at both @luvtheheaven and at @JustLoseFaith can also see when I post a new blog post at my From Fandom to Family blog. And so I’m slowly spreading awareness to the non-ace community all around the world, various strangers who started following me because of my fandom stuff, or my atheism, are maybe hearing about asexuality for the first time, and what it is. I’ve also posted two fanvideos on two different YouTube channels of mine to try to help spread the word to the people who are only subscribed to me for my vidding over on YouTube, but who don’t follow me on twitter or tumblr:


        I’ve had multiple people tell me that through either twitter, tumblr, or YouTube, I was their introduction to the concept, and that really is great to hear. I’m happy to be able to help spread the word too, completely through the internet, not needing to stand up and give a public talk (because like you, that really would make me uncomfortable).

        • That’s great! Happy to hear that you are doing such a good job spreading out the word to so many people! If we continue like this I’m sure in a (near?) future when somebody says they are ace, they will no longer get a “what does that mean” as an answer. 🙂 Nice video, by the way. I also visit your tumblr a lot to see your posts 😛

  2. Pingback: Ace obstacles | LGBTeen

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